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Breaking Up Is Hard to Do
Dating forms a cycle—dating around, going steady, breaking up; dating around, going steady, breaking up, et cetera. With the exception of the person you really love, you will break up every time you go steady. But how you handle it when the time comes is crucial. Let’s learn to do right.
Breaking Up With a Heart
I know of no gentle way to break up. Whenever two people who have cared for each other part, they will suffer. But you can do something to soften the blow and prevent more serious problems during this difficult time.
Seek counsel. If you have doubts about your decision to call it quits, seek advice from someone you trust and respect. When we are emotionally upset, we often say and do things we regret later. Unburden yourself, if necessary, to a trusted friend, a minister, a counselor, or a teacher. Explaining the whole situation in detail will help clear your mind, and the objective opinion of someone not emotionally involved in the situation often proves helpful.
Pray about it. Seek divine guidance. Ask the Lord to make it clear that you have chosen the right course of action. Also request His help in carrying out your decision with kindness. Pray that the person you are breaking off with will get over the breakup without suffering serious emotional or physical problems.
End the relationship as soon as you decide to do so. Rather than leading the other person on, take steps to end things after you have reasonable doubt.. Don’t pretend to care about someone whom you have lost interest in. Once you have made the decision, stick with it. Don’t be conned by promises to change, compromise, or do things differently.
And lastly, If possible, give the other person a warning. An abrupt break can have the same kind of impact as the sudden death of a close relative. Most people find it easier to accept the death of a terminally ill person than to face an unexpected highway fatality. They have had an opportunity to prepare themselves emotionally. When your dissatisfaction with a relationship reaches the breaking point, you might drop hints about how you feel. For instance, you might say that you are depending on one another too much. Explain that you feel it might be better if you both dated others with the possibility of picking up the threads later after each of you has had the opportunity to make comparisons.
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